Bye bye Geneva (and cousins)...

(from left to right) Emma, Sasha, 

William and Lana with Tara presiding over them all ;-)

It was really nice to see you and get to know you a bit. And thank-you for happily keeping yourselves busy and thus giving us some child-free time ;-) 

See you next year...

Actually one of the best developments of this summer has been that William and Emma have actually started to play on their own now - together but also each by themselves - leaving me a bit more time when we are home. Ah. Finally.  I can just picture it. I will come home and once shoes are off and hands are washed I will send them off to play and serve myself a drink and look through the mail or flip through the latest Living etc. and only 20 minutes later begin making dinner. Sigh. Bliss. 

Potty, dolphins, biking and the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

In all honesty it has not been the best week-end: mainly the kids were just crazy impossible (pink marker on the couch and poo smeared in the toilet bowl for the billionth time made me crazy) and whiny despite a really nice visit to the zoo and the dolphin show followed by an afternoon at the beach. 

The dolphins at the Attiko Parko show

 flamingos at the Attiko Parko Zoo

I think we really need to get some time away from them -  we are so tired of repeating the same things over and over again that it's just driving us nuts (and how crazy am I to be going to Geneva with them for 2 weeks on my own with no camp or day-care huh???!!!)

They say it takes a village to raise a child and being expat parents makes that difficult.  Sure we have kindergarden and all the International friends we make along the way and a bi-monthly baby-sitter but I could just really use a week-end without kids from time to time... (sigh) We could just sleep in, talk around coffee for an hour in the morning and read a magazine or just spend hours wandering on Internet...(sigh again) and just be in SILENCE.  Just some time-off. And the kids would love to spend a week-end with their grand-parents too I am sure!

Still, Steph and I had a lovely night out on Saturday (thanks to that baby-sitter I mentioned) ; we discovered a place that actually makes real Italian Pizza (with a thin crust - not the hut or domino's stuff) and enjoyed normal conversation without 30 billion interruptions, spills and wipes and then watched a truly delightful movie: The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel which was really uplifting and colourful. It practically made me want to be a healthy pensioner ;-)

Back to the kids with more positive news: on Friday, Emma did a fantastic job and biked on her own and without the training wheels. Yay! We've been going out for 20 or so minutes every day after (and sometimes before) dinner first with the training wheels and then without. At first she was just screaming in panic but once she felt comfortable that she could touch the ground and catch herself (and that I was running next to her holding the handle bar) she started to calm down enough to make progress. She still needs to practice of course but at least she now knows she can do it! Poor Will on the other hand has been left very much on his own on his balance bike and ended up getting rather upset so we'll have to make it up to him.

 Emma and I went for a Saturday morning 

orange juice and saw snails for sale!

Will is still pouting and steering away from me if I am not the one to get him out of bed (i.e. if Steph is). I then have to go out of my way to cajole my way back into his heart with songs and tickles and all kinds of tricks. He does this both mornings and after nap time if Steph gets him out of bed and not me. Of course if I do get him then he is absolutely fine with Steph. Isn't that weird?!! What a character!!

He has also been peeing in the potty! Only once a day so far.

 

It all started last week after he woke with a dry nappy for a few mornings in a row and I suggested we try the potty. It is summer after all and he seems to like the idea as he is always wanting to sit on it prior to bath time. 

 

So off we went and now we go there every morning.  So far he has only peed in it in the morning but I guess gradually he will use it before bath and when we come home.

I'll keep you posted. 

Mamma mia!

After the "non, non, non!" phase... we proudly present "Mamma mia!" or "maaamôn!"

Emma has not been a particularly clingy baby or toddler; her curiosity was always stronger than her separation anxiety and she has so far demonstrated a strong sense of security and confidence.
She has often stared at and analyzed new faces, greeted strangers in the street, sometimes even turning around to follow them. Playing on her own for about 20 minutes while I showered or had coffee in the morning was not really an issue and she has often sat in her high chair pouring endless cups of pretend tea while I chop veggies, the two of us attempting Ba-ba black sheep or Frêres Jacques a cappella.

Then, we went to Geneva for ten days.

Despite frequent visits from family and friends, baths and meals in good company and a few hours spent with family on her own, the two of us spent a lot of time together since there was no Kindergarden to provide both of us with "social interaction with peers".

We came back and all of a sudden it was "maaamôn!" five trillion times a day. Because she had a fever and the runs, I figured she wanted the added attention and cuddles 'cause she wasn't feeling well, but now I'm so sure.

Emma, who frequently wanted out of her pushcart, now wants to be pushed around and refuses to walk: she stands lifting her arms towards me indicating she wants to be carried or tries to scramble into her Maclaren on her own. In fact, she does not want to leave home without it!
On the rare occasions when she will walk, she will run off in the opposite direction chuckling. (I have stopped playing chase the toddler which she loved but I think she was not able/or willing to distinguish play from walking back from school.)Patience, patience... I'm sure she's testing me for something.

When she is in her high-chair she wants out and when she is outshe wants up. She even wants me to carry her insideat home. The little toddler who used to go fetch a book and "read" on the kitchen floor now wines and tugs at my pant-leg "maaamôn-ing" me constantly.

When the pediatrician tried to listen to her heart beat while she was sitting on my lap (and after having listened to the heart beats of the mummy kangaroos and the baby kangaroos on her desk at least 3 times) Emma got so upset and desperately clung on to me yelling as if she were drowning. She was utterly inconsolable and we didn't even manage to weigh her. This is the first time going to the pediatrician was a fuss.

Now, if I am around, even when her Dad tries to take her off to bed or feed her milk she pushes him away calling "maamôn" and she screams and screams if she does not get her way - something she never used to do.
When I do give her the bottle, she stops sucking every thirty seconds or so to look me in the eyes and say "mamôn". Initially, it was kind of sweet but after the first trillion times, it's rather irritating. What do I do? Well, if I'm there, I reply "oui Emma" or "oui, maman est là". If I can't attend to her at that moment I explain that I hear her but that I am washing the dishes/making dinner/whatever and that I will come when I am done. Sometimes I try to distract her by asking her to bring me a tupperware or help me put the laundry in the dryer. It seems to work for a little while but sure enough she's at it five minutes later.

Yesterday, after her Dad and I kissed hello, and I was carrying Emma to high-chair she repeatedly tried to kiss me on the mouth, maneuvering my face with both her hands on my cheeks and her mouth aiming for mine. It was actually quite funny but managing not to laugh, I decided to give her a few noisy kisses on the cheek and plonk her down for dinner.

Thankfully, there is no fuss at all when we drop her off at kindergarden in the mornings. She is still curious and greets stargers in the street and will joyfully run ahead in the park towards the swings, but at home, it is a pretty hard ballgame at the moment. I really hope it's just a phase. And I can't wait for the weather to get better so we can get out more!

Animals and their babies - how many do you know?

I can't believe the French language (the language we have chosen to speak at home and teach Emma) is so complicated!

Emma is really into animals at the moment, both in real life and into naming them when she spots them in whatever form (pictures or drawings in books, stuffed animals in shop windows, etc.).
Anyhow, we saw a bambi sticker on the wall of a kid's café/shop and I couldn't remember the name of the beast for the life of me. So, I googled it this morning and came up with the below list in French and then tried to recall the names in English. Woah! Not good.
Am I the only one?

1. un chien, une chienne et un chiot ; dog, bitch, puppy
   
2. un chat, une chatte et un chaton ; cat, cat, kitten
3. un dauphin, une dauphine et un dauphineau ; dolphin, dolphin and baby dolphin?
4. un éléphant, une éléphant et un éléphanteau ; elephant, elephant and baby elephant?
5. un lapin, une lapine et un lapereau ; rabbit, female rabbit, baby rabbit?
6. un lion, une lionne et un lionceau ; lion, lion, lion cub
7. un loup, une louve et un louveteau ; I'm guessing wolf, no idea, wolf cub
   
8. un ours, une ourse et un ourson ; bear, bear, bear cub
9. un renard, une renarde et un renardeau ; fox, vixen baby fox
10. une souris, une souris et un souriceau ; seriously? a mouse
11. un tigre, une tigresse et un tigron ;
12. un zèbre, une zèbresse et un zébreau ; I give up!
    
13. un bélier, une brebis et un agneau ;
14. un bouc, une chèvre et un chevreau ;
15. un cerf, une biche et un daim ; ummm bambi?
16. un cheval, une jument et un poulain ; stallion, mare, pony turns out a baby horse is either a foal (m) or a filly (f)
17. un homme, une femme et un enfant ; oh! I know this one! a man, a woman, a child
18. un lièvre, une hase et un levraut ; buck, doe, leveret (I had to look this one up!)
19. un porc, une truie et un porcelet ; boar, sow, piglet

(source of the French ones: Journal de Cooker: Tergiversations psychoquantiques)

Initially I was thinking the English equivalents were pretty easy , "elephant, elephant, baby elephant" right? and for the more complex ones dog, bitch, puppy...
but I started going down the list and decided I needed to look it up and it turns out English is not only more complex than I thought - although who the hell uses this terminology outside of a biology class or a farm? - but also very confusing... For example, did you know that a cow could also be a female elephant and a cub the baby tiger, baby lion or baby bear?
Ahh! this is just another humbling moment when you know you're just not going to know the answer to the questions your kids ask so start getting used to it. Plus, there are more important things to teach in life, right?
Still, I better get cracking before we hit the zoo as soon as it stops snowing!!! (yes, snowing on March 20th people when is spring coming to Vienna?!)

If you are as clueless as I was on the list above, check out the site by Enchanted learning where you can also download animals for coloring and games for your kids (or you) where you can pair up the adult animals with their babies.

having a second child... or not?

To have N° 2 or not to have N° 2... that is the question which is hovering in our household and on my mind these days.

I am going to be 36 in 3 months. My husband is 2 years younger. Emma is 19 months old. We love her to bits. Hopefully we will be staying in Vienna long enough not to have to move with a new-born again unless we wait too long.... but I can't say we are currently in a great big hurry to do anything about having N° 2.

Before I got pregnant with Emma, and looking at friends' kids, I thought 2 or 3 years difference was not small. Now I'm thinking more along the lines of "as long as it's under 4" (um.. or under 40). In my defense, should I need one, the Viennese winter with a toddler is about the most "I don't want to do this with two" inducing environment there is.

There is also the fact, that I can't help feeling that I am only just now enjoying some "me-time". Well, since she started kindergarden last autumn, really. Although, I realize I have said this a few times since she was 6 months old. With each milestone (full night's sleep, sitting, crawling, eating on her own, walking...) come some challenges but also more independence and more interesting occupations and activities for both of us.
Emma is now walking and talking a bit. She goes to kindergarden in the mornings and we do stuff together in the afternoons (playing, reading, park-going, but also the occasional food shopping at the market, cooking dinner, stuffing the wet laundry into the dryer...).

I like my own time. I like doing Pilates twice a week, having time to walk the streets of Vienna lost in my thoughts and observations, being able to go to a trendy café even if it's a bit smoky for a chat and a panino. I like taking some time to read my emails and visit other blogs, or read the paper on-line with a home made latte sprinkled with grated chocolate.
I also like the fact that when I am with Emma I can spend quality time with her because I have had my own time in the morning (reading, walking, writing, painting, shopping, talking, seeing friends, doing sports, whatever...).

It took me a while to realize that it was a lot less frustrating for me (and no doubt for her) if I did one thing at a time properly. One hours' play then one hours' cooking while Emma places stones in moulds with me in the kitchen. Then 30 minutes "reading" together while the meal simmers, and 20 minutes "Neighborhood animals" for Emma while her Dad and I have a chat. Then her dinner time, bath time, bed-time... We've got a routine going. Most of the time, it runs pretty smoothly.

I now find it much harder to function with the lack of sleep if she has a couple of bad nights due to a blocked nose or teething and find it absolutely exhausting having her home all day (when she is sick). In fact, I cannot imagine that I did it for nearly 15 months. I have grown accustomed to my comfort once again.

Admittedly, when babes are babies you can walk them around the shops, take them to lunch with your friends or with you practically everywhere and they will sleep/feed pretty easily. But what when you have a babe and a toddler? You can no longer nap when your babe naps to compensate for your night breastfeeding. You can no longer sip latte's on sunny terraces while your babe snoozes in the shade and enjoy a chat with a friend... You need to plan for two totally different ages/needs and try not to forget yourself... Yikes!


It's hard 'cause I feel the pressure of age (mine), and time passing by. I feel the pressure of the "if you wait too long you might not want to have a second" or another truism: "you might not get pregnant again right away...". I worry that the second will take away from Emma and our quality of life. I absolutely hated feeling torn in between my dog's needs and Emma's as a tiny babe. Constantly trying to satisfy both and failing miserably yet feeling constantly stressed and tired. I know I will hate feeling torn in between two of my children. Right now, I cannot see the benefits. Interestingly, hubs and I are rather aligned on this, although our alternate ups and downs aren't necessarily simultaneous.

Most importantly, I really wanted Emma. I loved discovering we were pregnant. Loved being pregnant with her (except for the last month where I was totally fed up and impatient to meet her) and loved having her. I don't feel that way yet about a second child. Maybe I will, if we wait a while longer. Maybe I won't and then we'll see.
I think you need to want a child. And as long as that's not the case we can discuss and think it over endlessly but it won't make me feel I want it.
So... like a friend of mine said in other circumstances entirely, "ask me after the summer!" and let's enjoy the spring and another birthday as a threesome.

For more reading on the subject: having a second child

Positive reinforcement

Emma's new favorite word is "bravo!" only when she says it, it's pronounced "bavow".

We use it a lot with her; encouraging her to walk, complimenting her when she manages to pop the lid back on something, eats up her meal, repeats a word correctly or simply attempts a new word such as the very difficult "chaussures" which currently sounds like "shushuuww" when handing us her shoes.

She has taken to the word and so nowdays she is exclaiming "bavow" all the time and for almost anything. She is so full of pride and smiles it's hard not to acknowledge it - even when she's done absolutely nothing special. Oh well.

We'll have to find something "more bavow" for the successes to come!

Emma in her fireman pants

When Emma is tired of walking (or frustrated, fed-up, impatient) she drops to her knees and reverts to her rapid crawling... fine by me -except when it happens in the muddy, wet park.
Solution?
Ta-da! Firemen pants!

Small victories, big difference

At the end of her third week in kindergarden, Emma is back to her 2 hour nap routine, although it now takes place at the kindergarden and from 11h30-1h30pm. Why is this so great? Well, for one she needs the sleep. But it also means I no longer have to spend my afternoons with Crankerella. Emma's beauty sleep means she's in a much better mood, which almost always guarantees that by sunset I'll be in a better mood too. (I'm crossing fingers it lasts!)

This week we have also made a huge progress when it comes to brushing her teeth. This is something I have been trying to do since May. On and off. Every time Emma would hate it so much I would give it a break for a couple of weeks and then try again. It's been very traumatic for both of us. I felt like I was pulling her teeth out rather than trying to brush them. Well, finally, she will let me brush them a little longer each day without it all ending in tears. We even use a little toothpaste (elmex for kids).
Every morning after popo we brush our teeth, and every evening after dinner and before the bath we brush our teeth and we even occasionnaly use a little tooth paste (Elmex for kids). Yipppeee! This is a TRULY BIG victory!!!
Also, I have now installed a step ladder in front of the sink and every day when we come back from the park or school and before meals we wash our hands! Yippee! This is also a victory 'cause Emma does not like her hands being touched nor does she like cold water, but it never caused the huge tears tooth brushing did.
At the moment I seem to be spending a great deal of time catching mugs or pepper grinders in mid-air, grasping at my mobile phone in an attempt to stop the bill from being astronomical as Emma has decided to call Asia, wiping snotty hands and noses, and basically just running around in circles trying to put out small fires. Ah, the career of a mother...at times it's just not gratifying and so exhausting - but I know in no time at all, things will have changed and I'll be discovering something else with Emma and family life... ups and downs and merry-go-rounds.

back from beautiful Croatia

We've been back from Croatia for a couple of weeks now but got caught up in kindergarden routines, the flu etc. and so I never got around to telling you about our little holiday in beautiful Croatia.

It's grey and around 10° in Vienna and autumn has come in most of Europe, so let me indulge my desire for sun and light by sharing a few observations and some pics of holiday weather with you. Hopefully it will help combat the sniffles!

Below the gorgeous view we woke up to every morning from our balcony at Villa Izabela.

Despite the familiarity of the destination (we had been in the region of Makarska Riviera in 2005 and I have spent many a childhood summer on the very same beach), or perhaps I should say, because of the familiarity of the place, I really enjoyed our holiday. Being an expat can mean that routine and familiarity are treasured more than adventure and novelty at every step! Taking Emma to the beach and watch her discover the salty water, pebbles and seafood was part of the fun. Not having been on a real holiday for ages made it more precious.

A note to new parents thinking of going on a holiday with their young one: Unless you can afford a suite, staying in a rented flat rather than in a hotel room really makes a huge difference. Not only can you cook, eat, play or nap when you feel like it, but you can actually enjoy your evenings à deux by having dinner, a chat, playing cards, watching TV etc. while your babe is safely asleep in another room. A Baby-call can also give you a little parental freedom. We managed Mojitos across the street one evening.

It was also fun to meet and interact with the owners of Villa Izabela to the point where they made us the most delicious palačinke (crêpes) twice and we helped their daughter with her English homework. Kind of like being part of the family.

The other great thing about this region's coast is that thanks to the "Sobe" (rooms) or "Apartmani" (apartments) the locals take part in (so logically also benefit from) the tourism. This means the coast has not been spoiled by huge hotels, locals feel less "invaded" by the floods of tourists since they are actively taking part in the logistics and benefiting directly from their stay. As for guests, their stay feels more homey thanks to home made food and morning and evening chats on the stairs or the patio. What a refreshing change from big hotels where you are just another guest needing a clean room by noon. If you value anonymous travel though, Croatia is not for you. Or at least not in June or September, the quieter, more privileged seasons.

Ok, now for some pics!

We also went to Plitvice, but the weather wasn't so good while we were there as you can see in a selection of my pics below.


























The scenery and colors are spectacular. I'd love to visit in the winter time when there's snow. Here are some beautiful pics of Plitvice in the summer time by Julius Silver. Definitely worth a visit if you're in that neck of the woods.

First sniffles

I guess we're pretty lucky not to have had any so far (Emma is nearly 14 months old) and it figures that is should happen after a week in Kindergarden. Although, the autumn chills (more like winter when in fact today is the first day of autumn no?) that had people wearing woolen hats, boots, long coats and sprouting umbrellas, are probably as much to blame.

Anyhoooo, Emma spent last night trying to breath through a very congested nose, banging the mattress with her hand in frustration as she miserably sniffled at having to loose her dummy in order to breathe.
Today she's as hot as a bun and a understandably a bit cranky.

I finally got out my nasal aspirator and "blew her nose" early this morning. She absolutely hates me decongesting her nose, but I should have done it earlier anyway- she's now out for the count and getting some much needed rest.

If you have any advice on how to make Emma's first sniffles easier please let me know!

Update:
Emma's now up, changed and dressed and has had her breakfast. She's still hot as a bun, with temperature at 38,7°C, sneezing and coughing a little - although I think this is due to the excess mucus running back into her throat.
Found this bit of useful information and have put the humidifier on in her room. Right now we're breathing in Eucalyptus essential oils.

Wish I could ask her to blow her nose but she doesn't know how yet not having ever needed to. I guess you have to have had a cold or two and be over one to know how.