Emma these days

She says "bonne nuit" when we put her to bed and "goûte maman" (taste it Mom) when she feeds me something.

She has chipped her big left front tooth ever so slightly, so it looks like it has a rounded bottom corner.

She'll hold out whatever part of her body she has just bumped/scratched/hurt for me to kiss better.

She carries a coat, blanket or bag around like Linus and says "meine" (mine).

She no longer wants to drink milk from her bottle or otherwise except sometimes if it has some honey in it.

She grabs my hand and pulls saying "komm! komm!" (come! come!) but doesn't always know where she wants us to go once I put down the zucchini I am peeling.

She bellows out "hall-o-o" to whoever we cross on the street or at the park and she always introduces me to whoever she is chatting to by pointing at me and saying "mamâaan" and then glancing back at them to see if they got it. She then sometimes goes on to tap her chest while exclaiming "Emma!".

She likes helping me put the laundry into the washing machine but needs help when pulling her pants (trousers) up over her nappied bum.

At the sandpit, she'll calmly walk away from a child that is scolding or pushing her because she has added more sand to their bucket or borrowed their shovel.

She loves hiding behind the curtains and screaming "ahhhh" when you pretend to be looking for her and she never lets you actually start looking for her when playing hide and seek.

Above all, she loves books - especially pop up ones although she still lacks the "delicate touch" required to manipulate them.

She can repeat "mamâââân" 1000 times without saying anything else when you answer her - as if she were checking you're there (for her).

She still can't put her shoes on by herself and hates having dirty feet.

She's definitely the centre of the world to us.

Parenting style up-date

So... I took the test to determine what is my parenting style and as it turns out here it is:




In case you're squinting at the above: My highest score is Active (43), then Autocratic (34), then Permissive (26).
Well, I was pretty sure I was not permissive and I was hoping I was more Active than Autocratic... Maybe I'll take it again in a while. I'd also like hubs to have a go at it.

Although I have to admit, at the moment I'm finding it really hard not to act autocratic when Emma ignores calls to remove her shoes, wash her hands, come to dinner etc. Sometimes the "kneel down, place hand on child's shoulder and try for eye contact as you speak" works, at others she is already meters away, off to play will her Lego or her mini kitchen and frankly couldn't care less.

Just another phase...

Sitting in the sun and peer pressure at minus 2

As you can see, Emma does not like the sound of drilling. ;-)

At the moment she is rediscovering her water bottle which she had rejected due to kindergarden peer pressure leaning towards the smaller bottles that need to be tipped to drink (i.e. there's no inner straw).

Can you believe it? Not yet two but there is already peer pressure happening! I actually had to buy her one of the "tipping required" bottles because she was constantly borrowing other childrens' and refusing to use her non-tip non-spill one. Go figure...

Anyway, nowadays Emma is increasingly drinking out of a regular plastic cup which is kind of handy.



You've got to love the warmer weather if only because it is great for water sports and experimenting with drinking out of cups -and hopefully toilet training one of these days...

What's your parenting style?

I was listening to yet another podcast of Kids in Mind (downloaded from my favorite English language Swiss radio station's website WRS) which keeps me happily entertained in traffic jams here when I cannot listen to another word of German! and Dr. Rachel Melville-Thomas (child and adolescent psychotherapist who I think is absolutely terrific!) mentioned this website and this quiz about parenting styles.

Interested? Well, I was and am about to do take the quiz... I'll let you know how it goes and what kind of style I have.

If you take the quiz, let me have your thoughts (and your results if you don't mind)!

If you have a bit more time, have a listen to some of the Kids in Minds podcasts which are really interesting ranging from "raising an only child" to "the roles of Dads", "Stepparenting", how to help your kid when confronted with a "new country, new school", aggession, homosexuality, leaving the nest, and many more...

Oh! and if your wondering how the potty training is going... Well, absolutely NO CIGAR (not one!) since my last post because Emma has changed her timing and is doing her business early afternoon when we are usually at the park or on our way back from kindergarden... I guess we'll have to wait a while...

Potty training firsts

Yesterday for the first time ever Emma pooped in her potty! Yay! (shhh! I'm actually trying to play it totally low key with her contrarily to much of the advice I have read on the web - I don't compliment her on getting her business done, nor do I clap and cheer while she is at it. So you see, the "yay" is just between us.)

Here's the story in case you're thinking of making the move too.

For some time now, the potty had been sitting in a corner of her bathroom (and the trainer toilet seat on the toilet) but Emma was absolutely not interested. Not even when I pointed the potty out as if it where a cool new toy.

Until last week the potty was just gathering dust.

Last week in Geneva, for lack of a shoe bench in our entrance, I even started using the potty as a chair where Emma could sit while I put her shoes on. And that did it. Introductions were made and the potty became part of her life. Every time we walked in, she would happily sit herself on her potty ready for her shoes to be removed and her slippers put on.
I was happy she was noticing the potty but wary she might consider it a chair.

Apart from leaving the toilet door open whenever possible and pointing out what Mum was up to, I didn't insist very much. I have been reading up on potty training, thinking that warmer days as well as Emma's growing maturity at 22 months and most importantly, the return of her "routine morning bowel movement" might make it an appropriate time for us to give it a try but it never seemed like the "appropriate time" since there was always something else going on (teething, traveling, new baby sitter, etc.).

After the first few days back at kindergarden and her sleeping patterns back on track, I figured: Why not?

So yesterday after her breakfast and a cuddle I asked her if she would like to use the potty. Off we went armed with a basket full of books. I pointed to the toilet with the soft and colorful trainer toilet-seat and she responded her usual "nein!" followed by a firm "no" so we turned to the potty. That was more like it! In a minute, there she was on the potty (no nappy and pants down) and me on the floor singing "the wheels on the bus" and "this old man". Every once in a while Emma would hand me a different book and stood up twice to give me a "bisou" (kiss) which she is big on at the moment. After about 10 minutes we were all done.
I wasn't too sure about how to go about the wiping and putting a clean nappy on since she was standing, but we managed. (I think pull up nappies would be the best option but unfortunately the kindergarden won't have them.)

After she was all dressed again, Emma came back to the bathroom and pointed to her poop in the potty, commenting something incomprehensible to me but she seemed very pleased with herself. We washed hands and brushed her teeth and I dashed back to empty the potty and clean up after she had left the bathroom having read that flushing a kids' "production" in front of them was not the appropriate thing to do .

We did it again today just as simply. Still not quite sure about "after part" since I would like to avoid lying her on her changing table again to put a clean nappy on, but it's hard to put a standard nappy on her while she is standing...
So if you have any ideas or tips on how to handle the clean nappy bit I'd be really interested.

More reading on the subject:

Potty donts
Potty training readiness video

According to HR Consultancy Mercer Quality of living 2009 survey (for criteria* read this post by Op-Expat Britta, I was unable to find it on the Mercer site) Vienna was ranked N° 1 city for Expats in terms of quality of life beating 2007 & 2008 winner Zurich (now at 2nd place) and Geneva (was already at 3rd place).

Well, well, well...Looks like we've lived in 2 of the top five cities so far. That explains why we're always so damn hard to please: Our standards are high through experience!
How amazing - but how wonderful really- that I never even think about security being an issue. Umph. Lucky lucky us.

As it happens, we're off to Geneva today.

Emma photo-update: the ice-cream effect

From very lady-like

to... ahem! Not quite sure what, but get those shoes of the cushions please!!!

2 (and a bit) more years to go!

I'm sort of throwing this down in the hope of remembering to dig it out when Emma is old enough to play - in the meantime I might just do some with Steph if he's willing to indulge me... (or rather if we find the time).

What am I talking about?

I read this post and was particularly delighted at the "nine" part of it by Catherine's son Ben and his friend Ava.

It's a hilarious and magical mad lib and I had no idea this is what they were called although I remember playing a version of these in my early teens with French speaking friends and finding it really fun. Hilarious sometimes, actually.

So, if your kids are old enough to play - at least 4 I think - give yourself and them a laugh and do some Mad libs!

Turkish escapade and the secret is in the room-service

So... we're back from our Turkish escapade

Four flights in four and a half days was pretty ambitious but it was well worth it and the Turkish hospitality and love of children helped a lot.

It was really fantastic to be able to pop by* Izmir and enjoy coffee or lunch with friends and walk the city centre again. It sort of felt as if I'd never left -except for Emma and other new babes of course -living proofs that time has gone by. It's hard to believe it has been nearly 2 years since I was there!!
The other "reminder" were the really nice developments in the city including the brand new Swissotel Grand Efes with its beautiful gardens, pool and terraces and some lovely new shops and parks.
Ah, the lovely cafés, terraces and sun. Ah, the böreks, gözleme, and manti... I have missed you.

As soon as we landed in Izmir, Emma was right in her element, receiving balloons from the hotel staff who played with her every chance they got.
We also discovered a side to Izmir I had no interest for at the time we were there: colorful childrens' parks in cool shade. The fact that we were staying right in the centre made things much easier and Emma had mid-day siesta's after her lunch and got to bed on-time despite us running out to coffee, lunch or the park in between. It was really nice and I am so happy we did it.

I've decided that taking a break at a place you know offers the best of both worlds ; you get the feeling of familiarity and although it's a holiday you also get the benefit of knowing your way around and having friends to spend time with. As far as I'm concerned, those are huge advantages when traveling with a toddler and making stays so short as we tend to do. Another significant advantage was the fact that we weren't staying in our own home/with friends/family. More on that later.

Istanbul was fun too, but the terrible traffic** put a damper on it for me. On Friday evening, we spent more time in jam from Ataturk airport to the Ritz Carlton than we did flying in from Izmir! A metro running under the Bosphorus is due to be completed in 2010 but locals seem to think that you would need at least ten of those to make a real difference in traffic.

On Saturday morning we went for a stroll around Taksim and for a walk in Bebek along the shores of the Bosphorus in the afternoon. After a short stop in the children's park, we wanted to have a coffee in quaint Ortaköy, but the bumper to bumper traffic totally put us off stopping there on our way back to the hotel.

On Sunday morning, we enjoyed a yummy hotel breakfast then strolled through Taksim and enjoyed a quick lunch at the House café in Tünel before heading back to the hotel.

Amazing how life, and travel in particular, with an infant or toddler is dictated by meal/nap/bed-times, isn't it? If you try to stick to them, that is. It's a very personal choice, but I always do my utmost to respect Emma's routine 'cause she is so much happier - hence so are we - when she is rested and properly fed. Nothing new there, but there was a bit of a revelation for me during this trip perhaps because it was a first since Emma was born : room service is absolutely brilliant! Even more so when you have kids. I thought we'd miss going out in the evenings trying to keep with Emma's bedtimes but instead it ended up being a plus.

(in case you hadn't noticed, this is no longer a post about Istanbul or Izmir or friends... but if you're a Mom you might want to read on)

Because the tiring thing about kids, is not the kids. It's trying to shop, cook, do the dishes, clean, tidy, change sheets, do/hang/fold/iron laundry, shower, be inspired, have a social life, make time and mental space and find the energy for partner/friends, answer emails, do the paperwork, go to the doctor/dentist/ophtalmologist, school/playdate find parking (I could go on forever, but you know the drill) all the while your little one is yelling, hiding things in cupboards, banging on the door, jumping on the bed, calling out your name mantra-like, pulling at your leg, pinching your thigh etc. and then finding the energy to play. That's what tires me.

I loved getting back to the hotel and just calling up room service to order dinner and then playing with Emma until it arrived, bouncing the balloons off my head with various sound effects making her giggle to tears. It was so much fun! After dinner, calling in-room dining for them to pick up the trolly while I settled Emma down in her pyjamas and sang her songs was just as relaxing.
No "what shall I cook tonight?" no rushed shopping, cooking washing up in-between the singing, playing, pampering, feeding, before the bathing, playing, changing, singing etc. No trying-to-do-it-all-at-once-is-making-me-feel-exhausted -and-inefficient-and-in-a-moment-I-am-going-to-become-very-impatient.
Instead, looking forward to a meal while being able to be 100% available and then a full tummy and inspiration and energy. Pause, sigh. The good life.

Can you believe Emma is enjoying in-room dining at the Ritz-Carlton and she is not even two?
In case you're wondering she is eating onion soup! and our room had sealed windows!!!

Now Emma has an eye infection and my sinuses are killing me so we'll enjoy each others company full time -without the room-service- for a few more days until she's healthy enough to go back to kindergarden .

A learning? If it's getting to be too much and you're going to blow a fuse: Stop trying to do it all, serve yourself a drink and chips (get some healthy-ish aperitif snack out for your toddler if you must) and play while you wait for the water to boil and make penne with you favorite Ricotta speciale sauce and serve strawberry yogurt for desert. The laundry can wait and everyone will go to bed happier.

*we stayed a total of about 30 hours arriving Thursday morning and departing Friday early evening

** with a population of nearly 20 million and huge amount of cars!

Emma update & Happy Easter

and here we go on another Emma update. So what's new?

Emma:
- has a mole!!! One single one on her otherwise perfectly white and unblemished skin
- has discovered the sand pit - à mon grand regret - and is bringing part of it back home
- might have some mysterious Portuguese origins: She says "déjaou" for "descendre" (to get down - from the chair for example - in French)
- is learning to kick a ball in our garden and loves going down the slide (or "rutschen" in German)


- likes fruit tea at kindergarten but not at home where she only drinks water and milk (apparently this is the way it is...)


- seems to always have things in both hands and is usually missing a third one to grab hold of more things... (genes, genes, what can I say... or maybe I'm totally retarded!)
- loves splashing in the bath, making faces to herself in the mirror and is increasingly interested in her belly button
- likes pointing out who is in the picture (I keep some in my handbag 'cause it's a great activity when trying to keep her sitting at the table while the meal is brought to us)

- likes croissants

- and Easter hunts

HAPPY EASTER!!!!

for more of our Easter pics click here

We're off to the thermal baths of Lutzmannsburg...

Bad, bad gardeners parents

We decided it was time to get our garden sorted out with the good weather finally looking like it was going to stick around for more than a hopeful minute and a half at 6am.

So we got our lawn mowed, brought out our garden furniture (the teak badly needed cleaning and oiling) and we bought two plants and potted them.

Meet, Rhododendrum

... and Azalea

This is what they are supposed to look like once they bloom.

Pretty right? Turns out... both Rhododendrum and Azalea are toxic!


So far, Emma has shown absolutely no interest in these plants but still... I can't say I feel great having these on both sides of our summer couch.

Soup for dinner and in the garden

As you can see Emma's appetite is back!

Just as good, she is wearing short sleeves and eating dinner outside in early April.

I love having dinner out in the garden as the sun gentle sets and we can enjoy its warmth. Oh, Izmir weather I miss you!

With each sunny day that goes by we are more adamant that our next destination as expats has to be a sunny one where we can swim and sunbathe and play outside more than 5-6 months a year!

Good bye winter coats, hats and shoes!

Finally, SPRING!

sunshine ✓
t-shirt ✓
sun-hat ✓
socked feet (no stockings for Emma!) ✓
garden furniture out ✓


Yay! It's FINALLY SPRING!!!!

Easter Party at kindergarden

Today, there was an Easter Party at Emma's day care center (kindergarden or school as we call it).

First parents were sat down to watch the "show" about the very hungry caterpillar where all the kids played the caterpillar (while the teachers sang) eating away at the apples, pears, strawberries, then the yummy alka seltzer leaf before building a cocoon around himself and finally turning into a beautiful butterfly.
After the show and since the sun was out, we all went up to the roof and searched for the Easter eggs hidden in the strawberry bushes, trampolines and other attractions, ate cake and drank tea and played with the kids.

Unfortunately, I just filmed the waiting-for-the-last-late-parent-bit before we all sat down for the show (and vertically!), but it gives you an idea of the atmosphere and the good mood Emma was in now that she has fully recovered.



Each parent/child got an small Easter basket to take home carrying the real painted chicken egg and a couple of chocolate ones in colorful wrapping paper they had found during the egg hunt. Emma insisted on carrying her little basket all the way home. After at least a dozen falls, and trying to feed a dog some of her feast, not much of the eggs was left ...except on her fleece jacket, scarf and jeans.



Anyway, it was fun.

Sunny weather

Saturday we finally had some sunny weather and so we headed to town and came across some Easter markets (they seem to have markets for many occasions here)

with lots and lots of painted eggs


We even went out without a coat for the first time in a really long time...


but just to make sure we didn't rejoice too much, it was raining and cold again today...


Oh, and some more good news is that Emma was more open to being entertained/fed/put to bed by her father and less clingy in general. Yippee!

Emma eating banans

Upon arriving in Geneva (March 6th 2009), bananas for tea and who are we going to see?

Mamma mia!

After the "non, non, non!" phase... we proudly present "Mamma mia!" or "maaamôn!"

Emma has not been a particularly clingy baby or toddler; her curiosity was always stronger than her separation anxiety and she has so far demonstrated a strong sense of security and confidence.
She has often stared at and analyzed new faces, greeted strangers in the street, sometimes even turning around to follow them. Playing on her own for about 20 minutes while I showered or had coffee in the morning was not really an issue and she has often sat in her high chair pouring endless cups of pretend tea while I chop veggies, the two of us attempting Ba-ba black sheep or Frêres Jacques a cappella.

Then, we went to Geneva for ten days.

Despite frequent visits from family and friends, baths and meals in good company and a few hours spent with family on her own, the two of us spent a lot of time together since there was no Kindergarden to provide both of us with "social interaction with peers".

We came back and all of a sudden it was "maaamôn!" five trillion times a day. Because she had a fever and the runs, I figured she wanted the added attention and cuddles 'cause she wasn't feeling well, but now I'm so sure.

Emma, who frequently wanted out of her pushcart, now wants to be pushed around and refuses to walk: she stands lifting her arms towards me indicating she wants to be carried or tries to scramble into her Maclaren on her own. In fact, she does not want to leave home without it!
On the rare occasions when she will walk, she will run off in the opposite direction chuckling. (I have stopped playing chase the toddler which she loved but I think she was not able/or willing to distinguish play from walking back from school.)Patience, patience... I'm sure she's testing me for something.

When she is in her high-chair she wants out and when she is outshe wants up. She even wants me to carry her insideat home. The little toddler who used to go fetch a book and "read" on the kitchen floor now wines and tugs at my pant-leg "maaamôn-ing" me constantly.

When the pediatrician tried to listen to her heart beat while she was sitting on my lap (and after having listened to the heart beats of the mummy kangaroos and the baby kangaroos on her desk at least 3 times) Emma got so upset and desperately clung on to me yelling as if she were drowning. She was utterly inconsolable and we didn't even manage to weigh her. This is the first time going to the pediatrician was a fuss.

Now, if I am around, even when her Dad tries to take her off to bed or feed her milk she pushes him away calling "maamôn" and she screams and screams if she does not get her way - something she never used to do.
When I do give her the bottle, she stops sucking every thirty seconds or so to look me in the eyes and say "mamôn". Initially, it was kind of sweet but after the first trillion times, it's rather irritating. What do I do? Well, if I'm there, I reply "oui Emma" or "oui, maman est là". If I can't attend to her at that moment I explain that I hear her but that I am washing the dishes/making dinner/whatever and that I will come when I am done. Sometimes I try to distract her by asking her to bring me a tupperware or help me put the laundry in the dryer. It seems to work for a little while but sure enough she's at it five minutes later.

Yesterday, after her Dad and I kissed hello, and I was carrying Emma to high-chair she repeatedly tried to kiss me on the mouth, maneuvering my face with both her hands on my cheeks and her mouth aiming for mine. It was actually quite funny but managing not to laugh, I decided to give her a few noisy kisses on the cheek and plonk her down for dinner.

Thankfully, there is no fuss at all when we drop her off at kindergarden in the mornings. She is still curious and greets stargers in the street and will joyfully run ahead in the park towards the swings, but at home, it is a pretty hard ballgame at the moment. I really hope it's just a phase. And I can't wait for the weather to get better so we can get out more!

the weather in Vienna and weekly round-up

The weather in Vienna is nice and bright if you're up at 6am (like when I get up to go to my electric therapy for my wrist)- after that it's just:

Grey

The building en face is nearly finished and so we are hoping for a relatively quiet garden to enjoy this year -once the weather gets better and warm spring starts! (why do we seem to be haunted by construction sites, huh?)

I made the best ever ginger, celeriac and sweet-potato soup! All the more for me, since Emma would not even taste it preferring a "bouillon de poule" (note: she calls soup, "poots" and I don't think that's German).


Emma has had high fever for the past 2 days (too early to know about today yet) and we haven't quite figured out why. Only symptoms are fever, slight crankiness, mild dürchfall (diarrhea) although her appetite is as usual. Could be stomach flu or last teeth coming out. Luck would have it: it's the week-end so I hope it doesn't get any worse!

Yay! She now like clementines! another fruit is always good especially since practically all vegetables are totally "has-been".

Oh, and she now calls her dummy/pacifier the "looola"! Really quite nice, don't you think? but I don't think that's a symptom.

Animals and their babies - how many do you know?

I can't believe the French language (the language we have chosen to speak at home and teach Emma) is so complicated!

Emma is really into animals at the moment, both in real life and into naming them when she spots them in whatever form (pictures or drawings in books, stuffed animals in shop windows, etc.).
Anyhow, we saw a bambi sticker on the wall of a kid's café/shop and I couldn't remember the name of the beast for the life of me. So, I googled it this morning and came up with the below list in French and then tried to recall the names in English. Woah! Not good.
Am I the only one?

1. un chien, une chienne et un chiot ; dog, bitch, puppy
   
2. un chat, une chatte et un chaton ; cat, cat, kitten
3. un dauphin, une dauphine et un dauphineau ; dolphin, dolphin and baby dolphin?
4. un éléphant, une éléphant et un éléphanteau ; elephant, elephant and baby elephant?
5. un lapin, une lapine et un lapereau ; rabbit, female rabbit, baby rabbit?
6. un lion, une lionne et un lionceau ; lion, lion, lion cub
7. un loup, une louve et un louveteau ; I'm guessing wolf, no idea, wolf cub
   
8. un ours, une ourse et un ourson ; bear, bear, bear cub
9. un renard, une renarde et un renardeau ; fox, vixen baby fox
10. une souris, une souris et un souriceau ; seriously? a mouse
11. un tigre, une tigresse et un tigron ;
12. un zèbre, une zèbresse et un zébreau ; I give up!
    
13. un bélier, une brebis et un agneau ;
14. un bouc, une chèvre et un chevreau ;
15. un cerf, une biche et un daim ; ummm bambi?
16. un cheval, une jument et un poulain ; stallion, mare, pony turns out a baby horse is either a foal (m) or a filly (f)
17. un homme, une femme et un enfant ; oh! I know this one! a man, a woman, a child
18. un lièvre, une hase et un levraut ; buck, doe, leveret (I had to look this one up!)
19. un porc, une truie et un porcelet ; boar, sow, piglet

(source of the French ones: Journal de Cooker: Tergiversations psychoquantiques)

Initially I was thinking the English equivalents were pretty easy , "elephant, elephant, baby elephant" right? and for the more complex ones dog, bitch, puppy...
but I started going down the list and decided I needed to look it up and it turns out English is not only more complex than I thought - although who the hell uses this terminology outside of a biology class or a farm? - but also very confusing... For example, did you know that a cow could also be a female elephant and a cub the baby tiger, baby lion or baby bear?
Ahh! this is just another humbling moment when you know you're just not going to know the answer to the questions your kids ask so start getting used to it. Plus, there are more important things to teach in life, right?
Still, I better get cracking before we hit the zoo as soon as it stops snowing!!! (yes, snowing on March 20th people when is spring coming to Vienna?!)

If you are as clueless as I was on the list above, check out the site by Enchanted learning where you can also download animals for coloring and games for your kids (or you) where you can pair up the adult animals with their babies.

Electrical therapy

A couple of months ago, I started feeling pain in my left wrist. Carrying/picking up/putting down Emma a zillion times a day (not to mention getting her into her car seat and pram while she twists and wriggles) had started to take its toll.

The last couple of weeks, it got so bad I couldn't even lift a freakin' frying pan so I instead of giving up cooking altogether, asked Emma's pediatrician if she knew of a good osteopath in the area.

Fast forward to Monday morning: after waiting for an hour (at 9h30 am!!!) I get to see the Frau Doktor H. who after a couple of questions, fiddles with my wrist and then with a smooth wave-like motion chinks some small bone back to mobility. Ta-da. She wiggles my wrist some more and checks that, yes, it feel less painful.

Not done though. She taps her keyboard while staring into her computer and sips some tea. She then tells me I am to have 10 sessions of therapy after which I am to see her again. I'm a bit surprised since I have a long-standing relationship with an osteopath and there was never any follow up therapy.
When asked, she says I am to go to the front desk to make the appointments and that her assistants will be giving me the therapy which is necessary because the bone has been left stuck for a long time. (Note to self: get to the osteopath asap next time!)

As I leave the room having thanked her and said "good-bye" she gratifies me with a "You're welcome" and shouts out "Nächste!" (next). I tell you, bedside manner or customer service could compete with the levels achieved by communism. (Am I totally spoiled because my doctor in Geneva always comes to get me in the waiting room with a warm smile and an extended arm?)

Whatever... she fixed my wrist, and was by no means the gruffest Dr. I've met here, so off I go, adamant to make the appointments earlier so I won't have to spend half my free time in a doctor's waiting room for the next 10 days...
As it turns out, early in Vienna is 7am!!
Ok - fine I'll do it if it means no waiting, fine. If Steph is around, he'll get Emma up, dressed and fed and I'll be back in time to take her to kindergarden. If he's not - well, I'll have to reschedule.
Oh, and I am asked to bring a towel or I will be charged 1.- Euro for one. Ummm...

So, Tuesday morning bright and early I head in for my therapy, expecting some sort of massage...
I am told to go to room N°2 and after a wrong turn and some re-routing in simplified German, I arrive in a room subdivided into about 20 cabins divided only by blueish dingy curtains that remind me of my student hall in London. Each subdivision, or "cabin" if you will, contains a camp-bed, a chair, a coat hanger and some kind of electronic instrument that looks like a very old-fashioned radio receiver...I also note the burn marks on the sheet of the camp-bed. Ummm...


I take a seat on the chair in my cabin and soon enough a lady in blue dungarees muffling "Guten Morgen" takes my prescription sheet from me and clips it onto the curtain with a laundry peg. After peering at it over her specs, she walks off and a couple of minutes later appears pushing another radio-receiver-like machine on a cart and squirts translucent gel onto my wrist. First the ultra-sound she says. Huh?
Oh, but it's not the kind they do when you are pregnant 'cause there is no screen. It doesn't hurt so I go along with it. 10 minutes of her rolling it on my wrist later, the radio-receiver-ultra-sound-providing machine beeps and she wipes the remaining gel off my wrist.

She rolls the ultra-sound cart away and comes back with what look like orange dish-cloths (the ones you wipe your kitchen counter with). Turns out they are orange dish cloths and they are wet. She tells me to remove my ring and reaches behind me to the first radio-receiver and pulls out some electrical cables. As if this were the most natural thing in the world, she sandwiches my hand between the cloths and pegs the electricity on to them. Ummm... I'm beginning not to feel so confident about this. Isn't water conductive?

In the end it was ok, a slight tingle and a rash on my hand for a couple of hours was all... I didn't get electrocuted or anything...

As it turns out, this kind of therapy is used for the relief of acute pain (back, wrist, knee, you name it) and what I did not see the first time was that there is a piece of paper coated in medical substances in between the orange kitchen cloths. The electricity is used to enable deeper penetration of the substance and the ultrasound apparently improves circulation.
There you have it. It was news to me, but it seems to be working.

Titties

I knew the Germans where into kinky sex - I recall a trip to Munich during high school - but Austrians? and in your neighborhood high street? Seriously?!

Titties but no nipples

having a second child... or not?

To have N° 2 or not to have N° 2... that is the question which is hovering in our household and on my mind these days.

I am going to be 36 in 3 months. My husband is 2 years younger. Emma is 19 months old. We love her to bits. Hopefully we will be staying in Vienna long enough not to have to move with a new-born again unless we wait too long.... but I can't say we are currently in a great big hurry to do anything about having N° 2.

Before I got pregnant with Emma, and looking at friends' kids, I thought 2 or 3 years difference was not small. Now I'm thinking more along the lines of "as long as it's under 4" (um.. or under 40). In my defense, should I need one, the Viennese winter with a toddler is about the most "I don't want to do this with two" inducing environment there is.

There is also the fact, that I can't help feeling that I am only just now enjoying some "me-time". Well, since she started kindergarden last autumn, really. Although, I realize I have said this a few times since she was 6 months old. With each milestone (full night's sleep, sitting, crawling, eating on her own, walking...) come some challenges but also more independence and more interesting occupations and activities for both of us.
Emma is now walking and talking a bit. She goes to kindergarden in the mornings and we do stuff together in the afternoons (playing, reading, park-going, but also the occasional food shopping at the market, cooking dinner, stuffing the wet laundry into the dryer...).

I like my own time. I like doing Pilates twice a week, having time to walk the streets of Vienna lost in my thoughts and observations, being able to go to a trendy café even if it's a bit smoky for a chat and a panino. I like taking some time to read my emails and visit other blogs, or read the paper on-line with a home made latte sprinkled with grated chocolate.
I also like the fact that when I am with Emma I can spend quality time with her because I have had my own time in the morning (reading, walking, writing, painting, shopping, talking, seeing friends, doing sports, whatever...).

It took me a while to realize that it was a lot less frustrating for me (and no doubt for her) if I did one thing at a time properly. One hours' play then one hours' cooking while Emma places stones in moulds with me in the kitchen. Then 30 minutes "reading" together while the meal simmers, and 20 minutes "Neighborhood animals" for Emma while her Dad and I have a chat. Then her dinner time, bath time, bed-time... We've got a routine going. Most of the time, it runs pretty smoothly.

I now find it much harder to function with the lack of sleep if she has a couple of bad nights due to a blocked nose or teething and find it absolutely exhausting having her home all day (when she is sick). In fact, I cannot imagine that I did it for nearly 15 months. I have grown accustomed to my comfort once again.

Admittedly, when babes are babies you can walk them around the shops, take them to lunch with your friends or with you practically everywhere and they will sleep/feed pretty easily. But what when you have a babe and a toddler? You can no longer nap when your babe naps to compensate for your night breastfeeding. You can no longer sip latte's on sunny terraces while your babe snoozes in the shade and enjoy a chat with a friend... You need to plan for two totally different ages/needs and try not to forget yourself... Yikes!


It's hard 'cause I feel the pressure of age (mine), and time passing by. I feel the pressure of the "if you wait too long you might not want to have a second" or another truism: "you might not get pregnant again right away...". I worry that the second will take away from Emma and our quality of life. I absolutely hated feeling torn in between my dog's needs and Emma's as a tiny babe. Constantly trying to satisfy both and failing miserably yet feeling constantly stressed and tired. I know I will hate feeling torn in between two of my children. Right now, I cannot see the benefits. Interestingly, hubs and I are rather aligned on this, although our alternate ups and downs aren't necessarily simultaneous.

Most importantly, I really wanted Emma. I loved discovering we were pregnant. Loved being pregnant with her (except for the last month where I was totally fed up and impatient to meet her) and loved having her. I don't feel that way yet about a second child. Maybe I will, if we wait a while longer. Maybe I won't and then we'll see.
I think you need to want a child. And as long as that's not the case we can discuss and think it over endlessly but it won't make me feel I want it.
So... like a friend of mine said in other circumstances entirely, "ask me after the summer!" and let's enjoy the spring and another birthday as a threesome.

For more reading on the subject: having a second child

stones and flower shaped moulds

How (weird) am I?

Today three different people asked me how I was. I mean really asked me - not just a reflex question or polite reply to me asking them.
Isn't that weird? Weird that I noticed (although to be honest, people are mostly asking about Emma or family abroad these days...) weird that it happened, weird that I felt weird being asked, just weird.
I figure, either I look really awful/scary/worried/sad now or I actually look less so, meaning I guess that I look more approachable and people actually dare the question now.
I'm not really sure which one it is. Nor am I sure which option I like better.

Emma eating away

In case you're wondering those are veggie ravioli with yogurt sauce.

some perks of an expat spouse life

Last year, mainly because of the disaster area our first flat in Vienna turned out to be and Emma and I consequently spending 5 months in Geneva, we didn't really get out and about much as a family. This year, we're planning on visiting a few places and people before we head off for our yearly sea-side in Croatia hopefully in sunny September.*

Like for example, this month, Emma and I will be visiting family in Belgrade (I hear it's as snowed in as Vienna is) and more family and friends in Geneva in March (hopefully spring will be right around the corner by then) and then, in April, we're going to join Steph and extend his working week abroad to a week-end play... in Istanbul. **
The exciting thing is that Emma and I can take a day to visit friends in sunny Izmir!!!

After all, Emma-in-my-belly spent quite some time there and it's only right that she should meet the friends whose voices she heard, taste the salads at Café Brownie's once again (...and maybe even a delicious cheese börek by our then obgyn's office or any of the yummiest fresh fruit and veg... I'm getting hungry must be dinner time!)
I knew this not-working-outside-the-home-expat-spouse status had some advantages...


* and maybe even somewhere sunny and warm next year so as to make the winter seem ever so slightly shorter ... but that's for 2010...
** oh and April in Istanbul 5 years ago is when we decided to get married! Seems like it was at least a century ago so many things have happened since!!!

the novelty of a walking toddler

Even if Emma started walking pretty late - apparently, doctors start worrying at 18 months - and hence is not exactly small at around 80-85cm her new found mobility has made her seem like such a big girl to me! Now more than ever she can unmistakably show that she has a mind of her own- like turning around and walking in the opposite direction whenever she feels like it and having us chase after her, which she thinks is absolutely hilarious. It also means that getting back from kindergarden takes forever as she tries to follow each person who responds to her "hallo"s, touches leafless branches/ holes in the wall/dents in benches and stops to exclaim "baaahh!" at the cigarette butts and chewing gum blobs on the sidewalks.

At home too, she will alternatively follow Dad into the dressing room and sit by the mirror as she watches him dress for work or come and get me in the bathroom or the kitchen.

Walking also helps her breach the communication gap when she is at a loss for words for her wishes; when she wants us to "read" with her she walks to "her" shelf in the living room picks a book and brings it to us or takes it to our "reading chair" tapping the seat with her hand so as to indicate we should sit; when she wants to go out she taps the bench at the entrance where we sit her down to put her shoes and coat on and sometimes say says "shushur" (chaussures = shoes in French) or "ko" (for "école" = school in French).

Her newest thing is to carry our empty chip bowl to the kitchen and plonk it on the counter -even if she can barely reach it- or to pick up a carrier bag and wave bye bye as she carries it off down the hall as if she were leaving on a mission or maybe just to go to work or to run some important errands...

Walking changes everything for Emma and for us.

40 + words

At the risk of raining on the parade of family members - who, when they see Emma, inevitably think that they've just taught her a new word in the bat of an eyelash, I wanted to run through her current vocab as she hits the 18 month mark.(!!!)

The mix of languages means that recently, the kindegarden teacher thought she was saying "Achtung!"("careful" in German) and not "Attend!" ("wait" in French)...

1. "Aïe" = "Ouch" in French (sometimes used to make us stop doing something even if I am pretty sure nothing is really hurting)
   
2. Emma - pronounced "Amma"
3. Attend - "wait" in French
   
4. Balle - pronounced "baaa" (ball in French)
   
5. Bain - "Bath" in French
6. Baby
   
7. Boire - pronounced "béa" (to drink in French)
8. "Njam njam" is for food, hungry, meal, lunch, dinner, etc.
9. Dodo - kiddie French for "sleep"
10. Bravo - pronounced proudly "bavo" or "bavow" (definitely a favorite!
11. Hello - pronounced "Allô" (for hello on the phone or hello in the street)
12. Salut - "Hello" in French which she pronounces as "ya-uuu"
13. Bye bye
    
14. Tschüss - an informal "Bye Bye" in German (she often says "Tchü-u" like "chew" in English)
    
15. "Datzi" - this she says as "thank-you" and is a mix of "danke" and "merci"
16. "Dako" - d'accord is "ok" in French
17. Thé - tea in French
    
18. Papà - Daddy in French, but also "bye bye" in German and Serbian kiddie talk
19. Maman - pronounced "môman" - also sometimes "Mama" or "Mum"
20. Deda - Grandpa in Serbian
21. Nonna - Grandma in Italian
22. Pata - for Patricia (her Grandpa's wife)
23. Gogo - for her other Grandma
24. Tatayéyé - for her aunt Annabel
    
25. "Yapu" or "yapeew" - Il n'y a plus = "there is no more" in French (--> finished)
    
26. "Ko" - for "encore" = "more" in French
27. "Bah" - when something is dirty or disgusting (nappies, garbage, mud...)
28. Pas bon - (literally means "not good" in French) when she does not like something
29. Lait - milk in French
30. Non! Non! Non! - also the German version "nein". Goodness she says this a lot!
    
31. Nez - "nose" in French pronounced "né
    
32. Opalah - Pronounced "Opaya" meaning something has fallen or that she has dropped it
33. "Vao vao" means dog - but she sometimes uses it for other animals like reindeer
    
34. Quack quack - for duck
35. Mao - for cat (she means "meow")
36. Muuu - for the cow
    
37. Schatzi - pronounced "tatzi" is what one of her favorite teachers at kindergarden calls her (kitten in German)
38. Tiens - "here" in French (literally "hold") both when she hands us something or wants us to hand her whatever she is pointing to
39. Woilà - from the French "Voilà" = (t)here you go
    
40. Chaussures (shoes in French) - pronounced "shushur"
41. Poo - for "Winnie the poo"
42. Poh-poh - for when she's done her business, only she "lies" about this sometimes
    
43. Beep beep - (from the refrain in the song "the horn on the bus goes 'beep beep beep' all day long")
44. "Wa-und wa-und" - (from the refrain in the song "the wheels of the bus go 'round and round" all day long...")

Gosh, I hope I've got them all now...

She recognizes way more words than she actually uses herself, although it seems that she is learning new ones very quickly at the moment - she actually watches our lips move as we say things and conscientiously tries to imitate the sounds we produce.

There are, however, some things she says we have not been able to identify (are they Emma words, German words or a mix of languages?) like "Ebaiiii" that she sings out so joyfully. Is it perhaps "bonne nuit" (good night in French)?

too much not needed to be done

Sometimes knowing what you MUST do (and doing it) is easier than (having the leisure to) figure out what you WANT to do.

Sometimes having lots that you MUST DO can be a great alibi for (fulfilling ones') life.
.
.
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Is it clear that I feel I get lost (in the "leisure" of) trying to figure out what I WANT to do?
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.
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Freedom can be a burden! hah!

and she walks!!!!

Emma a couple of days ago and today, finally walking on her own! Phe-ew!

Friendly Vienna

Many locals or people who have been living here for ages , have told me that Austria and Switzerland are very similar. Well, I wouldn't really know since I know Geneva, and Geneva is not really Switzerland, but on some aspects (nature, skiing...) I see where they are coming from. A not so nice potential similarity is that they say that within each Swiss citizen lies a policeman. Well, this certainly seems to be true in Vienna.

My Pilates teacher's husband was walking back home from the local Billa (a neighborhood supermarket) carrying two grocery bags. Suddenly he was approached by two policeman dressed as civilians and asked to produce his ID card. As it happens, he didn't have his on him. The policemen asked him why he was in Vienna, what he did here, where he lived etc. as if he was a criminal suspect! Really!!! In the end, they just let him go home telling him to always have his ID on him.

Another thing: When parking on the street, often a few people stop and watch and I always thought they were kindly there to offer assistance should you need it (you know, so you don't hit the kerb or other car when the visibility is bad and if your car isn't equipped with the "beep beep" or camera). Well, as it turns out, they are absolutely not there to assist you. On the contrary. I have been told they are there to check whether or not you hit the car behind you and make sure you leave your business card, phone number if you do. Nice.

Last February (during Vienna Take 1) for our first dinner in town with visiting family, after 2 attempts at leaving Emma with the sitter, we finally parked near the restaurant in a not totally legit space next to the kerb but not blocking any entrance or exit or cars. While parking, a man was eyeing us with such insistence that we actually noticed it and commented on it among ourselves. As it turns out, we had to get home in a cab, our car having been removed. The answering machine at the other end of the number we got from the police told us to press 1 to denounce a fellow citizen and something like 6 to get our car back.

Nothing like it to make you feel welcome. Come to think of it, one of the election posters I saw this autumn read: "Vote for XXX, because he is against them". Really warms my heart.

This is one of the less likeable sides to Vienna.

Emma the trader?

Just managed to catch the end of it as Emma launched herself into some kind of conversation or negotiation over the phone... never mind that she was actually talking through the remote control.
...and I guess my rendition of the phone ringing is just not credible. What was I thinking? Whose tune rings that way nowdays anyway?

January 3rd, at the Poirier -aka our pad in France

Positive reinforcement

Emma's new favorite word is "bravo!" only when she says it, it's pronounced "bavow".

We use it a lot with her; encouraging her to walk, complimenting her when she manages to pop the lid back on something, eats up her meal, repeats a word correctly or simply attempts a new word such as the very difficult "chaussures" which currently sounds like "shushuuww" when handing us her shoes.

She has taken to the word and so nowdays she is exclaiming "bavow" all the time and for almost anything. She is so full of pride and smiles it's hard not to acknowledge it - even when she's done absolutely nothing special. Oh well.

We'll have to find something "more bavow" for the successes to come!

Feel wealthy with Wii - Virtual Buying Power

Naturally, since we live in Austria, we have French satellite TV (nothing logical there, I was just trying out my early morning sarcasm) and so we have been exposed to (and sometimes depressed by) the relentless hammering on about the barely-there-and-falling-fast purchasing power of the French. I know, it's not nice to mock, but really...!

Anyway, the below is from Canal + les Guignols de l'Info and I thought it was absolutely spot on and so brilliant I wanted to share it with you - even in French.

pouvoir d'achat = purchasing power

Kind of reminds me of a movie I saw as a kid, where people got into cabin-like contraptions that kind of looked like today's self-managing public toilets, to make love. Charming....

What does Emma want?

Emma is in this really talkative phase where she mixes German, French, English and some of her own lingo, sometimes making it a challenge for us to understand her. However, her favorite word at the moment is very clear indeed; "Non" or rather "Nôn, nôn, nôôônnn!"

In case you're wondering, that's me talking to her in French.

Emma in the kitchen

Most evenings while I prepare dinner, Emma likes to sit on the kitchen counter and tear up reorganize the tea bags, pull out all the zip bags from their box or push things into the sink... nowdays she's getting a bit tall for the kitchen cupboards so I guess we'll have to figure something else out...

Emma in her fireman pants

When Emma is tired of walking (or frustrated, fed-up, impatient) she drops to her knees and reverts to her rapid crawling... fine by me -except when it happens in the muddy, wet park.
Solution?
Ta-da! Firemen pants!

Emma update - walking

The weather in Belgrade was gorgeous -Indian summer after autumn? - and so once again we out outside for our Slava. Emma tasted Ajvar, Ruska Salata, Pogacha, Sarma, Soup, and naturally, the torta while sitting in the highchair Baba (my gran) had bought for her first grandson Djordje over a decade ago.

Deda and Nathalie bought Emma her first pair of real shoes (for walking!) and what better place to take her first outdoor steps than on the banks of the Danube?

Here she goes!

I better book a massage, my back is already aching from assisting her in walking.